"Happy
Mothers day Ma!"....I heard this sound with my heart this morning, in fact
I think it woke me up. I heard my Lauren wishing me a happy mothers day from
heaven. It's a sound that I feared I would forget, and I never expected to hear
in this lifetime again, but I heard it. I heard the jubilance in her voice and
I detected her spirited presence. I could even see her radiant smile in my
mind.
The first
whisper of a happy mothers day from my first born. She was the first whisper of
motherhood I heard in my ear and felt in my belly as I carried her before she
was born. She was my first every experience as a mother. She taught me so
much...
She taught me to love someone more than I loved myself. I
didn't understand what this truly meant until I held her in my arms and in my
heart that first time....
She taught me to believe in myself because she always
believed in me, even when I didn't....
She taught me about Gods love because when I experienced
the pure love I had for her in the moment that I became her mother, I could
finally understand to the best of my human ability how God must love me....
She taught me about sacrifice, and made me realize the
sacrifices my parents had made for me....
She taught me patience and kindness and empathy and she
inspired me to live a better life and to set a better example for her.....
She taught me that there is more to love and existence than this life I am living now....
I find it very ironic that I was called her mother, yet
she was my teacher and my mentor and my inspiration....
And she still is....
Thank you, my beloved Lauren, for making this mothers day
and every mothers day a truly special day to celebrate. May I honor you as much
as you have honored me. Although we are
separated by that thin veil of time, we are still connected through our hearts,
and we always will be.
Tara Rodney
Mothers Day
May 12, 2013